Goodbye Grandkate

Bommie, Mom, Grandkate, Me, Emma (clockwise from left)

My sweet grandmother passed away last Thursday after a short and intense battle with Alzheimer's. Too quickly she went from anticipating the next time we could all be together to being anxious about not being at her home. The great lady that was so adept at planning a family get together and orchestrating a meal for 30+ people went to not being able to find her way around her own kitchen. But what did remain in her last days was the Holy Spirit within her. As my mother testified in her eulogy, when she would sing hymns over her mother or quote scripture over her, she always responded with "Praise God!" She did not know the day of the week or even what year it was, but the Spirit within her testified of her Father's great love and provision for her.
My grandfather is a rock. He never quit treating Grandkate like a bride. He waited on her hand and foot for as long as I can remember. Grandkate passed on 2 months shy of their 60th wedding anniversary. Grandpa, despite burying his wife yesterday, was out delivering Meals on Wheels today! I think Alzheimer's causes the longest good-byes. When the final farewell has been bid, closure finally comes and in the case of a believer, the graduation has happened. Those left behind long to remember the days before the illness. We hold very dear to us the great memories we have of Grandkate!
I thank God for her love, acceptance, and gentle demeanor. She never pretended to be perfect, but she was always genuine in her love for her family... all of us. It didn't quite seem fitting that her funeral was held in an unlit funeral home (thanks, Ike) with no instruments and limited chairs. However, the happy and funny memories that were shared overshadowed the negatives that, like her disease, nobody could do anything about.
Thank you Father for my grandmother. Help me to be as gracious and forgiving as she was with all of us.
Mom and Grandkate on Mom's Wedding Day
Here is her obituary:
A celebration of Katie Bea Kalkomey’s life will take place at Fredonia Hill Baptist Church on Tuesday, September 16, 2008, at 11:00 a.m. with Dr. Johnny Dammon officiating. Katie passed away peacefully at home on September 11, 2008, after a brief illness.She was born to O.L. and Lona Robbins on March 14, 1927, in Minerva, Texas. Katie was a life-long homemaker and devoted to her family. She was preceded in death by her parents and her sister, Dorothy Yawn of Silsbee. She is survived by her husband, Clarance W. Kalkomey, her daughter and son-in-law: Kathy and Bill Stevens of Nacogdoches, and her son and daughter-in-law: Kurt and Cindy Kalkomey of Dallas. She is survived by four grandchildren and their spouses: John Mark and Camille Stevens of Nacogdoches; Sharon and Kris Krahn of Dallas, Matt and Lisa Stevens of Farmer's Branch, and Tim and Lynne' Stevens of Calera, Alabama. Katie is also survived by 13 great grandchildren whom she dearly loved.

New Year, New Challenges

We are half way through our first week of the new school year. Boy am I tired! I did not work today and was able to take Cynthia and Annalee to the park. It made me reminisce on a time in our lives when we were not hurried or on a set schedule with more to-do's than we could say grace over. Emma and Katie have so many memories of days at the park, wandering around malls, going for hikes and play dates. Cynthia has a few of these memories also. Poor Annalee doesn't even know what a play date is! I am afraid her childhood memories will revolve around chasing her sisters up and down the road from one volleyball game to another and one piano or fiddle function to the next.
Yes, today was a good day. My phone did not ring once (a gift from God) and my attention was totally focused on my children. Cynthia got a taste of being a "fun" big sister to Annalee without anyone to direct her every move. The fact that I am still in a full leg brace following knee surgery only serves to give her more freedom with passing along orders to Annalee!
But now tomorrow looms! I am ready for it. The girls are on track with school ( thanks to the home school co-op) and I am gearing up for a busy year. God is blessing me with lots of business and has answered my request that I would find favor in the eyes of my colleagues and mentors. I am embarking on a challenging year of travel with BioSET, doing an internship under Dr. Cutler, and teaching the intermediate seminars beginning in December.
All of this hustle and bustle causes the days to fly by quickly and as I watch my dear, sweet Grandmother lose her life to Alzheimer's I see that this is the day for sowing seeds of faith, for stopping to listen to the silly joke that does not make any sense, for holding back with criticism and instead giving praise. My dear friend Katy and I frequently remark that tomorrow is not ever promised us. Today is all we have, and that makes me think harder about the legacy I am leaving for those that come after me. What will my girls remember most? My harsh tone or my smile? Will they remember when I played games with them and stayed up late watching movies or will they remember me being too tired to interact with them in the evening? When they have their own children, will they be equipped to raise them in a Godly home, and will they want to bring them to visit me? I hope that whatever they remember about their childhood, they will see my motives and forgive my ocean of shortcomings with them.
There will never be another time that is more opportune than this to do what God put me here to do. I must get on with it!